-

2009-04-18T17:11:00.001+08:00

lol! something freaky happened when i was playing bejeweled on facebook.

anyway i love bejeweled! :)

2009-04-11T13:11:00.003+08:00

thanks judy! (: i feel much much much better already!

__________________________

I'm not FedEx.
I don't live to deliver
I live for myself. :D

2009-04-10T17:24:00.002+08:00

B for PW!

one of the 15% that didn't get an A.
everyone's telling me it isn't the end of the world.
but anyway i still cant believe my class % of distinctions is lower than school's average.

sigh. actually im more worried about the 4H2s.
T.T
A levels is a torture.

anyway, i don't think i want to go to university after As.
i wanna teach autistic kids!
i want to make a difference in their lives, and help them!
i asked dino: "if one day someone ask what am i working as, and i tell them i'm teaching autistic kids, will they laugh, or give a weird stare?"
dino said:"why should you care about them"

true,
maybe everyone will be more impressed when you're a lawyer, a doctor, manager, etc.
but as long as im doing what i like,

i'll be satisfied with my life.
:D

2009-04-08T23:47:00.003+08:00

sigh. fell sick again. i want to sing but i cant. lousy throat :S

grrr.

anyway! happy 1 year 1 day to dino and me! :D
among all the guys i met, dino is the one that understands me best. we've similar likes, interests, thoughts.

sometimes i feel kinda weird about it so thats why i've decided to support liverpool instead of man utd. HAHAHAHAHA.

:P

just kidding

i've picked up new stuff, like pool, bowling, card games, etc along the way.
i still can't appreciate beer tho. but i super love lychee martini. hahahahaha.

the minor disagreements strengthen our relationship, instead of weakening it.

:D

i don't have a problem with his friends too, just that i cant seem to relate to them well. the topics are weird. ok, normally its 75% soccer and 25% weird stuff, or them suan-ing one another. -.-...

ai yah, but anyway!
i feel happy with dino.
dino's a super nice guy.

except that he doesn't open the car door for me, and whines when he carries my school bag. hahaha.

but considering that he sends me home everyday, and drives me around, entertains me, cooks for me, carries me when i faint, drives me to alexandra hospital instead of NUH when i feel like im going to die, nags at me to eat my medicine.....

i'll give him 99/100!

:D

______________________
alright, its very late already. and after typing this whole chuck, i almost forgot im sick. shall go sleep. :)

2009-03-16T00:28:00.001+08:00

tag replies

qinny: okay! reserve for u (:

angeline: then... thats quite sad le... :(

2009-03-12T21:28:00.001+08:00

my daddy's funny.
today's econs paper..

and so he asked:
"so how was it? duno one or two questions is it?"

then i was like:
"duno everything lah!"

then he was like:
"o.o bluff me lah"

o.o but the thing is, the paper only got two qns mah. which is duno everything lor -.-!!

2009-03-10T19:15:00.001+08:00

im afraid im changing.

everyone changes with time........ including me.

2009-02-26T00:01:00.004+08:00

two cases.

1) you really don't understand.
2) you refuse to understand.

i guess if you're at no.2, no one can help you, only yourself.

i don't usually fall into the 2nd category. which is quite sad, cus i really really don't understand but everyone else understands.

so am i like. stupid or something?!?!?!

not emo or what, just frustrated at myself. maybe i shouldn't try too hard to understand, cus someday, i will slowly realise what this whole kuku thing is about.

(and no, im not talking about lecture notes -.-....)
________________________________________

lol. im totally in love with clothes from taiwan!! i know this is like huh, why are u like so random kind of thing. but! i finally stopped looking at the blogshops with the usual stuff like those cute cute tees, and tube dresses, and i finally searched for shops out of the country~~~

haha. good returns!

and do you believe that this shirt is only about $4+++? (exclude shipping fee and stuffs)
(shirt by maymaylu shop)

haha, ok it looks kiddish but i love the bright colors!
:p

k shall end here.

2009-02-17T20:45:00.002+08:00

to forgive is to love

(: yokie taught me that.

sometimes, even though you disagree, or hate someone, dont feel like talking to someone because you think that person did something terribly wrong to you. or just offended you. or make you upset,

we are still learning humans.
all humans make mistakes.

you may think you didnt make any mistake, or you dont know the mistake you make. or you choose to believe you didn't make that mistake.

but actually its kinda obvious to other people.

so do listen to what others have to offer.

and if you really hate someone,
forgive them.

because, you make mistakes too.

and i think, the world would be a much better place with love <3

2009-02-16T00:17:00.001+08:00

then i ask myself,

if i could turn back time, would i have done the same thing?

then i said. yes i would. i bet everyone would, too.

thats if they're in my shoes.

2009-02-09T21:53:00.002+08:00

today is the day.

and eric says. sometimes, you can't please everyone.

but, why do i feel so weird inside.

2009-02-08T00:13:00.004+08:00

photos!!!!!!!!

This is how i look like when i was in sec one! (or is it two?)lol. (:

And yes, i do have a high forehead (ok receding hairline, whatever). lol so i dont look good w/o a fringe :S

My hair was longggggggg. but thats not the longest. it almost touched my waist! and i had alot of hair. and after i thinned it for like a few times.. its now... almost gone o.o ( oh btw im the one on the right)

I miss the blue uniform. and my friends too (: 7 lings!!!! i'm glad im still somewhat in touch with them tho. esp yuling XD.

and i think i've aged o.o. i looked much younger in my sec 4 days!!!!!!!!!!

2009-02-06T22:00:00.001+08:00

lets keep smiling (:

2009-01-14T21:21:00.002+08:00

2009-01-07T21:10:00.004+08:00

somehow today i feel super happy haha.

cus i thought about all my friends,

and DINO!

then ill think that. oh wells at least i dun have any friendship/relationship problems!

i wish that my sister will recover soon. so that we can have a nice and happy family dinner on chinese new year.

yups. and today is 9 months (:

2008-12-09T11:48:00.001+08:00

hello to my dead blog :D the reason why ive not been online is cus my keyboard is dead and im using the on-screen keyboard now T.T

updates:

i held a live snake in zoo!

a parrot flew onto my head when im in the bird park

i had my first lychee martini (its damn strong, abt 40%?) and im not drunk!

i had my first bowling session and i actually manage to score!(is that the word?) but ended with pathetic 61 points anyways :(

im going to get braces wahaha:p and i just did a root canal treatment.(not pain anyway)

and ive been in and out of malaysia every sunday

sounds quite fun? haha. nice hols, except for hospital visits and lights out at abt 9 almost everyday :/// ok and many other stuffs:////////

and homework :X

2008-10-28T23:32:00.000+08:00

i love the song: drops of jupiter.

can i have it as my funeral song next time?://
thats random.. but it would really be nice haha.

2008-10-20T22:28:00.000+08:00

2008-10-16T16:40:00.000+08:00

mmmm, results bad so far.

*emos

sigh, today was bad too. just hope that no one will hate me cus they think im an act cute type :/i proved to dino once again that cute songs are not very accepted in hc :/ and i just hope that people wun hate gefang cos of my bad singing sigh.

!! yeah, sometimes i just spoil everything zz....

2008-09-29T22:59:00.000+08:00

my hair now (:

so actually its not short! haha. its still longggggggg.

2008-09-23T21:31:00.000+08:00

meiling with short hair!

ahahahaha. omg. :// tag and tell me how i look!

*ps. dino says he will kill people that says my hair looks ugly LOL.

2008-09-22T10:51:00.000+08:00

woke up super early today. :/
and im still sitting in front of my comp.
i have 9 minutes left to bathe and meet dino downstairs. but guess he's gonna wait for me again. haha.

so its gonna be another day in the lib.
so its gonna be another day of mugging.

sigh*

well, ill just take more breaks later. haha.

PS: and i really want to perm my hair! no, not those tight curls, but the wavy kind. guess im hoping to look more matured with my new hair. hahaha. (: but a digital perm is about $200! D:

2008-09-22T10:33:00.001+08:00

nice song (:

和平世界
歌手：铁竹堂

it's my specidal play for you.....

and since the day of our birth;

our humble existence on earth

for some,life is like a blessing,

for some,it's worse than a curse

but when you're facing drama,

you know you gotta stay a soldier

whether you pray to the lord,

brahma,allah,even buddha

maybe we should listen to the pope

and listen to the dalai lama but now

everywhere is war;

children grown into trauma

phobias drive us in (to)conflicts;

religious racial economic

creeds,and convictions.

we're fighting each other over bullshit

but that's the life,the strife;

that's just the way it goes

no one really gets along;we're all enemies and foes

we take(away)each other's freedom

forthe most selfish reasons

somehow we're all killers;we kill as we're breathin

by not helping grandparents,

mothers,sisters,and brothers

father,please forgive us before

we all hurt one another

the only thing universal is blood,sweat,and tears

for years the young the elderly and all my dying peers

it's time to say goodbte but baby don't u cry

你不要太难过因为我一直都在

cuz i'll be there up high be always by ur side

你不会太寂寞因为我不曾离开

也许上帝创造生命只是一个笑话为什么

人们虽然知道生命是无价却互相残杀

和平世界只会出现在童话

现实生活中的生命总是遭到无情践踏无穷的欲望

每个人都想拥有一切最后的希望谁能拯救这世界

别让它从和平意识还在萌芽的时候

就被疯狂的人类进行攻击而遭到毁灭

面对死亡的时候才会知道真相

当生命结束的时候一切都只是假象

就像梦一场你能带走哪一样

金钱权力或毒品哪个能够带上天堂

天上的神请帮助我教导我该怎么做

才能够让世人了解这后果

如果当子弹穿过脑袋的时候才能够看透

也许这世界已经没有救没有救

it's time to say goodbye but baby don't u cry

你不要太难过因为我一直都在

cuz i'll be there up high be always by ur side

你不会太寂寞因为我不曾离开

why when i open my eyes,i see no peace and no love?

i see people cry and die,

more tears more sweat more blood

living under constant danger,

it don't matter where you are

somehow someone will always be

more than ready to start a war

each day,hour,and second,gotta hold on to your weapon

and if they kill you first,die a hero go to heaven

some fight for more power and some fight for equality

killing each other for money,resources

,and territories

i've seen the barrel of guns

and they took away my friends

sometimes it seems to me that

we are all headed fot dead ends

headed no where fast;the next second might not last

in a blink of an eye,we become a part of the past

yesterday was history, tomorrow's a mystery

today's a present;i thank the god above me

cuz at every moment,it might be your last breath

you could see your own death

it's time to say goodbye but baby don't u cry

你不要太难过因为我一直都在

cuz i'll be there up high be always by ur side

你不会太寂寞因为我不曾离开

sorry妈妈我知道你对我的期待

请你原谅我以前那么叛逆那么的坏

妈妈please don't cry, dry ur eyes

就算我在天上也会想念你烧的菜

但是现在我要为兄弟奋力一搏

我要保护着他就像你那么保护着我

do u know ?我没有表面看起来那么懦弱

我会干掉每一个敌人虽然我感觉到有些困惑

为什么对我开枪为什么互相叫骂

为什么让我受伤为什么同是人类却感到害怕

为什么侵略我的家

难道说和平真的只是古老的神话

不过我还是站在这里

保护我的兄弟

不管是要死要活我都跟你在一起

剩最后一口气

我不会忘记用我的血液

对这场战役作无声的抗议

it's time to say goodbye but baby don't u cry

你不要太难过因为我一直都在

cuz i'll be there up high be always by ur side

你不会太寂寞因为我不曾离开

2008-09-09T00:04:00.000+08:00

after the performance at ecp (: thick thick makeup there. lol.

zi-lianing.

(: mugging!

today is mugging physics. kinda ok. did 2 chaps of revision + some questions. mmm. now doing the third chap. or more like.. slacking awhile then continue if not my brain will burst.

will start on chem tmr!!

(: oh. and im supp to blog about my birthday. haha. but there are too many pics! maybe get them next time and upload or something..

2008-09-05T23:48:00.000+08:00

had a weird dream about haven. hmmm wasnt as perfect as i thought it would be if there's a haven.

): suddenly feel so weird. i always wanted to like.. live forever and ever and ever and never ever die. but if haven turns out not to be what u've expected, not perfect, not nice, will u still want to have eternal life?

mmmm...

2008-08-24T17:19:00.000+08:00

songwriting finals competition at sajc finals (:

dino said he is proud of us! hmmm so.. i guess it sounds ok?

but anyway just watch it. haha.

we got 4th anyway ://////

but.... placings aren't really impt.. right?

2008-08-21T21:00:00.000+08:00

MY LIGAMENTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
AHHHHHH.
the chinese doct go and rub my ankle until its even more swollen
I KNEW IT WAS A BAD CHOICE FROM THE START TO GO THERE OMGOODNESS WHY I GO WHY I NEVER GO ANG MOH ONE OMGGGGGGGGGGGG.

ok. stop spamming hahaha.
people say giving birth is painful,
i feel like my leg has given birth
-.-

ok nvm stop lame-ing

erm wait. if i stop spamming and stop lame-ing,
i might as well stop blogging

ok bye!!!!!!!!

2008-08-11T11:14:00.000+08:00

life is like fireworks,
short but beautiful.

or rather,

beautiful cus its short.

haha, so sometimes being short is a good thing.
tall so what!!
ermmmmmmm. ok dun lame :////

2008-08-04T01:05:00.000+08:00

sometimes it freaks you out when u know.. hey actually alot of people reads ur blog. ermmmm when u think ur blog is rather abandoned.
and sometimes u hear from other people that someone is readingur blog. *gasp*
and sometimes, some random person click "next blog" and just nice jumps to ur blogand starts reading..
wow, kind of freaky
then sometimes i feel like not writing alot of things out. cus its so weird to see lots of people reading it.
LOL!
but i still blog anyway!
MEILING IS WEIRD!!!!
-erm is it kind of anti climax 0.o?

2008-07-30T22:02:00.000+08:00

i've got poor organisational skills.
i'm bad at persuading people.
i'm bad at studies too, i mean.. even when im attentive in lectures i dont even understand what the lecturer is talking about, and i need like maybe 30 minutes to figure out how to do a question in tutorial :S

i know i am bad at alot of other stuff.
i know i need to jia you.

mei ling jiayou!!
jiayou jiayou!!

________________

but still, im not god lah.
and i cant act like one too.
zzzz.
i wish i have more than 24 hours for one day.
although everyone gets the same amount of time.. but some people can do alot alot alot of things in that time,
but i cant!!!

like, people can do 1 tutorial in 1 hour
i can only do 1 question

maybe being noob is a crime. -.-
sorry lah.
i also want to be pro.

why the world like that.
):

2008-07-23T21:19:00.000+08:00

sorry if i've ever offended anyone.
i dont mean to.
_____________________________________________

meiling wants to be a nice person (:

today went kino to buy book on transfat and read half of it.
today went to buy a pink bag at bugis village. mmmm its nice(: its light pink with vertical stripes. heh. cus my other bag is like tornnnnnnn ://

and now im doing chem, after chem i have to do physics. after physics i have to do maths.
:/ thats about all.

i want to do well in my studies!

2008-07-11T13:48:00.000+08:00

london bridge is falling down, falling down, falling downnnn

stressed up days.
://
homework, cca, homework, cca homework, cca homework, cca.

and so on.
i think this is just jc life,
time to get used to it!

OH, and im not an emo person hahaha
im happy alright. just stressed.
and if you think im an emo person, im not exactly one.
i usually blog on emo days. haha so from my updates, u can see that most of the days im happy! yayness.

and hello to strangers out there
dun judge me from the blog posts:D
get to know me.
and ur life will be brightened. (i hope :X)

2008-07-06T22:19:00.000+08:00

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

LAAAAAAAA MAK!

haha :X
just a random post when im bored from being busy. ummm.

2008-06-15T23:25:00.000+08:00

too late.

its always too late.

and i'm tired.
i want to catch up on other friends lives.
i want to catch up on my studies.
i want to do the things i like.
of course, i know i need to do cca stuff.
i need to spend time with family.

but i guess im just missing out too much.
makes me frustrated.

very frustrated.
cus now, even if action is taken,
sometimes its too late.

and i can only blame myself.
sigh.
stupid mei ling.

2008-06-15T16:49:00.000+08:00

I HAVE BEEN TAGGED BY YULING

===

Rules & regulations of this quiz:

A) People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs & replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves with answers.

B) Tag 4 people to do this quiz & those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by. Continue this game by sending it to other people.

===

Q: If your lover betrayed you, what would your reaction be?
A: WOW. haha. gg lo.

Q: If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
A: To go new zealand yayyyyyyy

Q: What will your dream wedding to be like?
A: hahha to have all my friends as the bridemaids! like yuling, kenghwee, wendy...etc. hmmm then it must be fun! yay.

Q: Are you confused of what lies ahead of you?
A: hmmmmm... i think so

Q: What's your ideal lover like?
A: someone like dino! hahaha

Q: Which is more blessed , loving someone or being loved by someone?
A: being loved (:

Q: Do you love your life currently?
A: nope. not at all. busying for cca stuff and concert stuff. no time to go out with friends zz. no time to mug. no time to do anything interesting. :/

Q: If the person you secretly liked is already attached , what would you do?
A: Give up.

Q: Is there anything that made you unhappy these days?
A: yea, kinda stressed up too.

Q: Is being tagged fun?
A: haha alright lah. :D

Q: How do you see yourself in ten years time?
A: ahhhhhh. fat fat and ugly!

Q: Who are currently most important people to you?
A: friends bah omgoodness. havent really talk to each of them nicely. urgh.

Q: What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
A: haha, shes nice and nice and very nice. a person who will stand by you even if you are poor, ill and sickly and irritating and yuck, well so long as you are her friend. hmmmm. shes stubborn and violence is definitely not her last resort (probably the first :P) haha. and she always hide things/feelings to herself so that people wont worry. but thats wrong wrong wrong! but well, i like the way she is, very special :D always my darling.

Q: Would you rather to be a single & rich or married but poor?
A: married but poor. hmm at least im not lonely. but it depends. if its a bad partner then...... even if its married and rich, i wouldnt want to marry.

Q: What's the first thing you do every morning?
A: wow, ill say : 5 more minutes to my mum hahaha

Q: Would you give all in a relationship?
A: Depends on who.

Q: If you fall in love with two person simultaneously, who would you pick?
A: wow. ill pick none! haha. my hormones not so hiong -.-

Q: Do you have a pet?
A: SPARKY! (rabbit) and 3 goldfishes and 4 hamsters

Q: Are you different at home/in private from what your friends know you from?
A: heh heh heh :D what do you think? :P

i tag:
wendy, kenghwee, meiting and dino!

2008-06-13T22:55:00.000+08:00

(thats my hand with all the different colored light sticks, taken on the day we sent brandon off)

after the rain,
there'll be a rainbow.

NO MORE GREY SKIES!
:D:D

2008-05-22T23:13:00.000+08:00

我的天空今天有一点灰
我的心是个落叶的季节

hahaha emo!
this is a blur pic taken near dino's house.
its along that stretch of houses.
the sky was exceptionally grey that day so i took the pic
its like.. it looks like its gonna rain anytime, or it might become sunny anytime
but for now, its just plain grey.
and no one knows what will happen in the near future.
isnt the sky scary?

2008-05-19T23:37:00.000+08:00

ahhh, let me have a happy update although i am feeling rather emo looking thru some pics i found in my comp which i thought are long ago deleted.

sometimes i do stop, look back and think.

and think and think

and suddenly i stop thinking.

cus i remembered someone telling me the past is the past and we shouldnt always look at the past.

WAIT. ZZZsupp to be a happy post ZZ

haha let me post some nice pics.

seeeee this is me. TODAY! i got bored waiting for someone who is SUPER late. haha. ZOMG can. but since u're speeding and the poor car is about to die soon, i forgive u :D

but we weren't late for cca, so its okay! haha.

practice today was alright. learnt the whole dance for my song already YAY. kinda happy cus i mastered the dance! hohoho.

yup. ok theres another new pic in my phone which is the one on the project on bridge building. haha. its quite funny at the end when hanzhe was screaming when the bridge is about to break from the weights. haha.

my pip bridge group!

haha. alright.

thinking of css makes me...

i duno.. its an unknown emotion

a rush of something.

something mixed.

:/ but i know i wan to see every single one of them

seeing a person in css uniform walking about makes me happy. and i would always point and exclaim: see! thats my former school! nice uniform rightttttttttt.

haha.

i miss yuling!

i miss qi lings!

i miss css.....................

and i miss choir

2008-05-15T00:13:00.002+08:00

EMO :'(
THE WORLD HATES ME
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFF EVERYONE

just to be a little AA :P
alright, i hope everyone is reading now!!!!!!! :D:D haha
actually, there will be preview concerts this SUNDAY 18/5/08 at tampines mall and jurong point, 230pm and 630 pm respectively!

it will be fun and excitingggg! trust me! haha and of course, we will be selling charity coupons at $10( you can get a nice goodie bag with vouchers and I weekly and POCKY omgomgomg haha (: ~~i love pocky!~~) but anyway, yep its worth it lah, u might even find 77th street clothes inside it if you're lucky enough ((:

YES! and we are also selling EP albums (5 songs, sang by ng chee yang, campus superstar 2006) $12 ($14 if you want delivery)

yupyup! do come and support and cheer and also to help buy stuff to raise funds for ACRES! (animal concerns research and education society)
yup! its for a good cause

and yes, do see you there!

2008-05-05T09:29:00.000+08:00

down with flu.
): back aching like mad.
the world spinning around.
but thank god no fever yet.

mmm. after reading wendy's blog, i wondered. if i had a chance to turn back time, will i still choose to be together with louis.

.
.
.
.

i guess i probably would.

then i relooked into my definition of love. which is -- unconditional love.
i realise its hard to reach the stage of unconditional love anyway, since humans are all selfish. including myself.

then suddenly i realised. i really duno whats love.
whats love?

for now i shall not think about it. i shall just do the things the way i want to do it and someday i might finally understand.

in a very long ago post, i said: "say goodbye to that small girl inside my heart. shes dead"
but today i say: "the small girl never died, but just hid herself in a small dark corner silently waiting for a light to shine on her again. and the light shes been searching for, waiting for, is finally found"

2008-05-04T21:45:00.000+08:00

reading wendy's post made me sad.
i suddenly wonder what the world has changed to.
how different it is from just maybe half a year ago.

when people part and head toward a new direction,
are our hearts still together,
or are we just trying to convince ourselves that we are still close but actually its not true?
will we still be sharing private stuff, have little random chats, laugh madly and be ourselves 10 years or even 1 year down the road?
i silently wish for the answer to be yes.

looking at the photos on wendy's blog, i suddenly feel disgusted by myself. even though she's not with eugene anymore, the photos are still kept well.
on the other hand, i deleted all of mine, every single trace of him. i kept every single thing that reminds me of him out of my sight.
is that avoiding?

i dont know.

on thurs i suddenly cried during the labour day prac.
no one noticed but dino did.
its cus a song reminded me of the past relationship.
i supposed to be happy and love my life.
but why do i still keep looking back into the past?
so i tried to cover my feelings, saying im tired.

i guess i didnt want to hurt dino's feelings cus im tgt with him and i shouldnt be thinking about things like this.
but i guess it would hurt even more if i dont say my feelings out anyway.

but i must say im moving on well and fine
except on certain emo days.

2008-04-30T23:00:00.000+08:00

oops. sry for the post ytd, or should i say early this morning.
guess i was too emo after a long day
i would say im alright. haha. so far havent trip and fall and bleed badly anyway!
((:
thanks for all the concern, i really truly appreciate it.

and today is an equally long day. but i gonna rest early and ps all my homework.
i realised i've been hanging out more with cca mates than classmates.
:/ i think i should bond more with classmates!

but for now, wait till concert is over bah.
so ill be busy till 31st may or one week after the concert.
mmmm..

2008-04-30T00:08:00.000+08:00

someone asked why i moved on so fast, how did i forget the previous rls.

well, if love is so easily forgotten,
i dont want it.
that isnt love in the first place.
at least, not unconditional love.
or at least, unconditional love didnt work out for us.

and i didnt forget the previous rls.
i kept the sweet memories with me.
probably to him its my fault it ended that way.
and to me its his fault it ended that way.
but now i think, its no one's fault.

__________________________________________

i duno why almost everyone is emoing right now.
:/
so even when things come crashing down on me in my life,
i stood back up fast
so that i know at least i can help by consoling people who are sad and to try and make them happy again.

but who truly knows how im feeling inside?

the fear.. the truth.. the unknown future.
went to the cardio just ytd.
signs of abnormality of heart structure.
of course, it cant be confirmed until a further diagnosis.
which means i have to go for an ultrasound scan of the heart.

and two dates of the following appointments are on 20/8 and 27/8
20/8 is the date of ultrasound scan
and 27/8 is the date of seeing the doct and analysis of results.
what a joke. its supp to be a HAPPY birthday.

now 27/8 is not just a normal birthday to me
it brings a new meaning
a new anticipation
and of course, fear.

i duno. im confused.
i dont want to know.
recently been tripping quite alot, losing my balance, feeling giddy when dancing and i need t sit up on my bed for a longer time after waking up.

i duno if its related to the heart thing, but the doctor said there are three possible reasons
1) heart
2) nerves
3) something else (forgot)

so meaning if the heart test is ok, it might be something wrong with my nerves -.-

URGH.

nevermind. i wonder why im posting stuff like this anyway, but i guess i do need to speak out my thoughts or else ill go crazy soon feigning happiness and smiles.

2008-04-22T00:59:00.000+08:00

:D

uhhhhh its like 1am now. and i just finished my work for change!
no its not homework, study for tests etc.
haha. but im very very happy i duno why too but im just happy hahahaha. maybe its cus i settled quite a few stuff today and i didnt get scolded. hoho. managed to find happiness in doing work. thats not being sadistic. thats called.

PRO. hahahahahaa

nevermind!

dino's damn irritating! he keeps laughing non-stop.and now he says he lonely cus there're no cars on the road and he's driving home. from jurong all the way to thomson! haha. oh my. bad driver. how can he drive and sms at the same time!!

TSK.

but anyway today was really damn busy. reached home at about 11pm and bathe and smsed like crazyyyy. and its all about work stuff omgomgomg.

ok. stop complaining! nights to all (:

2008-04-20T11:05:00.001+08:00

absolut raspberri!
(: had a small small small portion of it.
its 40% anyway!
so imagine the liquid sizzling down ur throat
and the strong raspberry taste lingering in ur mouth.
mmmmmmmmmmmm. haha.

didnt mix it with sprite or other drinks though.

haha. dino has a Absolut Vodka collection in his bedroom.
Absolut Apeach,
Absolut Raspberri
Absolut 100
Absolut Ruby Red
Absolut Vodka (80 proof)

and he's gonna get Absolut Vanilia soon!
and he claims he don't drink them but only opens it for his friends to drink. i so believe can! -.-

oops i just realised im only 16 so i cancelled out the upper portion of my post. haha. so take it that u didnt see anything :D

i forgot that im still young hohoho. YOUNG AND SMALL! :D
suans dino*

LALALA. alright. dino's gonna come later to fix my comp. apparently he assembled his own comp. so he's gonna fix the cpu fan for me heh.

alright. happy mugging day!!

2008-04-18T01:15:00.001+08:00

thats us

awww. there's really one funny and childish game in dino's psp. cheers me up everyday, even when we baked brownies till like 2am++ ytd!

oh and did i say it turned out nice? haha
see! ~~we're~~ i'm talented! :D:D:D

aww. lots of cca stuff nowadays, there simply isnt one day without cca. haha its fun, but tiring. mmm but i do hope i get into exco though. *prays hard*
___________________________________________________
hugs t my dearest yu ling.
may ur life be filled only w laughter and smiles,
ill take ur sadness and dry ur tears
i hope u two will be okay soon alrite.(:

2008-04-16T14:25:00.000+08:00

lol. talked to yu ling a while ago.
mentioned about louis
but somehow i dont feel emo at all this time round.
just neutral, veryvery neutral.

mmmm, thats good isnt it (:
although its rather weird. from lovers to strangers.
maybe it'll be more weird to stay as friends.

mmmmmm.
________________________________________________

but anyway!
dino's in my house now.
haha. we're going to bake brownies!
woots. and im mugging like crazy hahaha.

sigh! lots of things to be done. but i kinda like this busy lifestyle of mine. haha. its busy, packed but fufilling! i love the people around me alot alot.
and also the people who are not with me alot alot too!
cus i know they're just right behind me.

:D

YEAP!
sooooooo blog again next time!

2008-04-09T22:06:00.001+08:00

besides commenting on the age difference and his looks,
what else can people say?

oh my. -.-
why do i live in a world filled with superficial people.

_________________________________________________________
yes, i've moved on. and everything u said came true, once again. are u happy? i've met the right person for me. the MR. perfect.

have you?
wish u happiness always (:

2008-04-09T21:30:00.000+08:00

(: today is kinda happy and also embarrassing but its alright!
MMM, did emo for awhile but dinner with dino cheered me up.

:D
aww and need to submit minutes by today. need to search for quotations for tentage and ponchos. and need to submit proposal for wilson's birthday tmr! HAHAHA yes, draft a proposal for wilson's birthday and CC TO ZHIYANG ETC. wahahaha. crazy idea by me and meiting.

so tmr will be shopping day w meiting, wilson, maybe qinny and dino.
yepyep. actually its just walking town and searching for sponsors. (:

oh and yes. im with dino 07/04/08
if anyone thinks im just finding a substitute after losing my ex,
well think again
anyway if u really thought like that, then i dont think u know me well anyway.
so dont condemn my decision.
thanks :D

2008-04-06T22:50:00.000+08:00

i love everything!
including my life.
my friends

YAY.

im happy ((((:
and there's now a new definition to happiness.

2008-04-02T23:40:00.000+08:00

if just one wish can be granted now,
i wish that all my friends wont have to go through any form of torture, be it mental, physical, etc. esp for the people i care for most, and i think they know who they are. then they will find and see that rainbow appearing in their lives after the terrible terrible storm.

i really truly want to see them happy.
and i pray hard they will find their happiness.

(: lets all be strong, even if all you see now is question marks.
_______________________________________________
random thoughts: hmmm, i wonder if yuling is doing fine.

2008-04-01T22:56:00.000+08:00

i feel real lousy nowadays. have so much things to do, and so much things to handle at one time. CHANGE, homework, tests, cca, relationships all over..

i really feel bad not being able to be there for the people i care about, esp my friends.

sigh.
i must have been a bad friend.

2008-03-31T22:41:00.000+08:00

got my phone back! thanks dino! (:
finally my line is uncancelled. hahaha.

yep had dinner with dino to thank him.
(: enjoyed dinner alot alot!

then i msged the person ive been missing all this while. (which is yuling)
and im missing alot of people, esp people from css.
T.T
HAIS!

but its okay, we're friends forever (:

2008-03-30T17:41:00.000+08:00

yay (: dino went to take back my phone.
THANKS DINO!

so now i have to un-cancel my line.
UHHH. :/

sigh. and there's econs test tmr.
lol, okay im getting random.

2008-03-29T22:50:00.000+08:00

oolost my phone today ):
feeling kind of lowwwww.

my poor phone! AHHHH. i think i left in on the cab. sigh*
anyway i returned home at like. 1030 pm today.

and im so sleepyyyyyyyy.

then today i thought about alot of things on the bus trip home.(while listening to shan hu hai) thought of the secondary school days, and compared it to the days in jj, then to the days in HC.

made me emo awhile. haha.
but i feel touched cus im constantly surrounded by people who love me alotalotalot. and yeah, sometimes i do take them for granted. okay fine most of the time.
so,
i love yuling!
i love qi lings!
i love 4/1!
i love choir!
i love css!
i love my fake siblings!
i love OG22!
i love 08s14!
i love HC second intakers!
i love 08s6a!
i love ge fang!
i love change!
i love HC!

yes, of course i love my family!

oh and not to forget some random people not from my pri sch, sec sch or jc and somehow i know them they know me. haha (:

i feel so loved!
hmm and now i wonder what will people be thinking when they cant call me or realise i didnt reply their sms-es URGH.

:/
________________________________

yu ling did u enjoy ur camp? wanted to call u today night but lost my phone -.-
________________________________

get well soon dino!
yes i lovelovelove your singing!!!!!!!!!
take care yah, even though ur temp is now 37.8 but not 38.9, drink more water and rest well alright. if not u will treat me to dinner everyday hahaha.

oh yes, dino is my idol. (:

2008-03-27T21:55:00.000+08:00

music clinic cancelled. :/sigh*

anyway!
dino thrashes people in pool.
like like he can shoot 5 balls in at one go, then miss one badly so that i can continue playing

LOL!
URGH.

hahaha, yeap, and we do think the same.
like colored photos in funerals
like vegetables.
like.. uh alot of things (:

and i left my jacket on dino's car. URGH. URGH. URGH.
):
nevermind ill steal his jacket next time hoho.

2008-03-25T23:35:00.000+08:00

dinner with dino (:
hmmm felt really bad ps-ing the class for dinner, but agreed to dinner with dino earlier. sorry!

haha, anyway we ate at thomson, prata house.
yes, milo DINOsaur.
:D
the place brought back some happy memories.

dont really feel like doing a detailed post on today.
tired of blogging everything down haha.
but well conclusion is that today was fun and really enjoyable.(:

2008-03-24T21:08:00.001+08:00

hmmm, lets see. today i really thought alot.
it happened when i tripped over nothing while walking to assembly.. i suddenly thought. why do i keep losing my balance, dont walk straight, trip over nothing and i feel weak at times, like my body isnt my body kind of thing.

then i remembered the doctor asked me to do the exercise of pointing to my nose then to his finger thing. yes, the one in one litre of tears, the exact thing.
and he asked me to walk placing my foot in front of the next and walk, see if i can balance well.

hmmm, then he say there might be something wrong with the nerves (while he pointed to his neck) or it might be due to weak heart.
i thought it was funny then, but now.. i cant just laugh about it anymore. esp when i was reminded of the terrible ending of one litre of tears.

the next checkup with the specialist is in late april.. and im really scared cus it will be a full body checkup. so i guess from now till that day, no matter what the result is..

i'll do the things i always wanted to do, say the things i want to say, and live my life with no regrets

ill gather all my courage, to face the unknown future!

and thanks dinokor for this sms that really touched me: "lidat nxt time we go out i must hold ur hand if nt u cant walk straight and will fall down...."

awww, its really nice having a big elder bro like this. (:
reminds me of the people who are willing to hold their hand out to me too.. yes, so now ill be strong yeah!

2008-03-23T18:59:00.000+08:00

i love my weird dreams, perry :P yes i will stay cheerful (:
-----------------------------------------------

mugged at jp lib and mac with dinokor!!!! SOMEONE ps us last minute, and siao eh(shao wei) didnt manage to join us too.

lol. so mugging turned out to be song listening session. what to do! we are from Change! concert mah :D and it so happened that both of us like the same songs!

we're like, long last brothers and sisters!!
haha. yeap, so it was a happy reunion session with my dino-kor
wow so today i got a new elder bro (6 years older), and i've always wanted a brother like that. yayyyyyyyye.

hmm, and i wonder how's louis today. is he happy? can he feel my happiness? mmm, i found someone with the same interests, but it doesnt mean that we are meant to be too right? its a different feeling altogether.. like.. long lost brothers and sisters. yeap, thats the only phrase i can use to describe this feeling.

and i feel a strong urge to see your smile, right now.

2008-03-23T07:11:00.000+08:00

im sorry desmond
i dont need anyone to take care of me.
-------------------------------------------------------
ive been dreaming alot, and its all about louis.
ytd i dreamt louis lying on his bed, asleep. i stroked his hair and i saw him smile. then i smiled too. its such a blissful thing to be beside the person you love, loving him, caring for him silently.

thats a feeling i can never forget.
a feeling of caring for someone you love
the thought of it makes me smile. (:
he might not love me anymore, but i still love him.
its such a weird feeling.. something i've never experienced before and no guy has ever made me feel like this.

i want to be someone's guardian angel.
to catch his smile from afar.
to see him lead his life happily.

2008-03-22T21:30:00.002+08:00

i really really really felt bad today.
really bad.
):
today i ate my breakfast and lunch! and it was filling too. i did take care of myself. i didnt drink cold stuff. i didnt eat the things i cant eat. and i drank plain water too.

but i still got gastric pain, and its super terrible this time. so painful that i didnt want to talk at all. then i felt scared cus im still at the training, and its like.. i know i cant even walk out of this school, i know ill faint. and the canteen's closed, coronation plaza seems so far away..

and im thinking: how can i ever get chocolate milk.

sigh.
then i wondered who i can call for help.
well in the end people in the CHANGE concert went to the nearest 7-11 outside school (which isnt very near) and bought gastric medicine for me. was really really touched. everyone was asking if im okay.. and i decided not to be stubborn and shook my head.

i really did take care of myself..
but somehow.. my body doesnt listen to me.
i hate being weak.

i want to be strong too..
): i feel so sad.

--edited: oh yeah, thanks brandon for sponsoring more than half of my lunch, the medicine and the choco milk!

lol yes, and of course to tian shui who gave me 10 cents (he claimed he only get 10 cents a day for pocket money) yesyes i do believe him! lol.. a guy with psp and n73 -.-

2008-03-22T07:40:00.001+08:00

i get happy dreams every night..
and when i wake up my heart aches

makes me feel like reality is a nightmare going on forever.

--edited: listening to "the great escape" makes me smile today. haha (:

2008-03-21T08:39:00.000+08:00

today is GOOD FRIDAY!
so be careful if you're going cycling. hahaha.
i remembered the time i fell down while racing with louis on bike. i was about to win... then suddenly i fell..

and the scar is still very obvious!!
T.T

so everyone be careful!
lol (:

today still need to work ): have to practice for the mini performance. sigh* thats really really really bad cus today is good friday and we're not supp to be doing anything but just slacking!!

haha, shouldnt complain so much.

--and i must be veryveryvery careful not to fall today, cus louis wont be here to wash my wound and help me bandage it again.

2008-03-20T23:10:00.001+08:00

www.08s6a.blogspot.com

(: what i did today.
and i had dinner with desmond too.

tried real hard to be happy, but somehow my mood kena ruined totally by just one song played at the Kpool. then no mood to play anymore -.-

no lah, i didnt cry cus of the fact that im too noob!! i just shot one ball in and then after that i cant take it anymore cus of that song then i cried zzzz.

2008-03-19T17:08:00.000+08:00

"let me tell you a very cruel fact jie, he dont care about you anymore. he wont be responsible"

2008-03-18T08:37:00.001+08:00

Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You like privacy very much because you enjoy spending time with your own thoughts. You like to disappear when you cannot find solutions to your own problems, but you would feel better if you learned to share your thoughts with a person you trust.

http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

lol.. its really very true -.-
got it from evonne's blog. was wondering how accurate this type of tests can be.

2008-03-17T17:39:00.000+08:00

slept the whole day.. tmr im not going school too. had alot of weird dreams recently. really dont have the appetite to eat, but still must eat..

so im rather full now although i seriously feel like vomitting.
and sleepy..
and im having back aches.

:/ its just terrible.. but im happy that alot of people care for me(:
ill make sure i recover soon, mentally and physically.

2008-03-17T09:09:00.001+08:00

talked to my mum about freedom (:
she says i can transfer to poly if i want.
then i can work part time just like i always wanted.
she says she doesnt want me to go out late cus she doesnt want me to sleep late cus of my pile of homework.

why does she say certain things only now?
yeah, its always too late.

~~but it this truly the thing i wanted?~~

2008-03-16T07:31:00.000+08:00

cus a bird thats soaring in the sky, it wont bother helping the bird caged up for fear that it will be caught and lose its freedom again.

and now i can only press my face against the hard and cold window grilles and stare helplessly at the sky. after the painful struggle i put up, i still lost every bit of myself.

and the heartless bird just flew away, finding a new life and a new mate.

2008-03-15T07:52:00.000+08:00

http://www.literaturecollection.com/a/wilde/330/

the story of a nightingale and a rose (:

2008-03-15T06:40:00.002+08:00

woke up early in the morning..
and had diarrhoea again. lol.
see i said eat too much isnt good what -.-

ANYWAY, i know everyone's here for me!
even louis right (:
i mean the real louis now -.-
maybe ill feel terrible, he might feel abit terrible
and im making everyone feel terrible

but, ill let go and move on.
let go and move on!
let go and move on!

lol. brainwash myself -.-
hmmm regrets? abit lah, cus i thought if i werent persistent on a breakup and said i would be the someone when he asked for the first time, maybe we'll still be together!

but there's always a tiny chance that we'll be together as couples again.
and its a bigbig chance that we'll be together as friends
so we'll still be together. haha
no its not self deception its a fact zzzz -.-

thanks to yuling for pei-ing me for alot alot of days and telling me alot alot alot of things and helping me to move on by saying cruel things(but i know u meant good) (: love ya!
thanks to wendy and kenghwee for ytd, consoling me and telling me he's a jerk even though i dont think so lol. (:
thanks to woon yang for helping to cheer me up, lunch with me, and happy birthday too!(:
thanks to ngee kiang, jolynn, hui yi, joanna, perry, sun shuo, judy, shu qi , jun xiang, diona, stephanie, desmond, pei qi, huang bei, louis (from my class), boon ping, damien for consoling me and being here for me (: love you guys too! (: you guys are all impt to me!

and er zi (shawn lau)for standing by me.. calling me to check if im fine.. then crack jokes so that i can cheer up. sorry er zi u dont have a dad anymore :/

thank you shao wei my 私奔 partner for consoling me and laughing with me like nobody's business ( and we were cursing the people arranging us to sing love song together when both of us had a breakup with someone else not long ago)

thank you to tian shui who tried to cheer me up ytd by saying i can touch his botak head if it can make me smile. haha. and for saying :' i wan i wan' when i say no one wants me. (although i know u dont mean it -.-)

hmm did i miss out anyone. haha
but anyway its just thanks to everyone that cares for me.. (: and even though u dont say it, i know u are (:

haha, like leon ( i think he's shocked when he ask if im fine i said i am then i burst out crying and ran out of the LT :X)
and jon quek! ( for asking me why my face so stone and asked if im sick)
and people who were like strangers but gave me a hug when i said im feeling sad.

and louis tan, for the memories since 14/10.
and stop dao-ing me leh -.-

OH YA, everyone buy tics for my concert can :X
can see me 私奔 with shao wei haha (:
its like $8 and all of it goes to charity
yeap, 30th may at singapore discovery centre according to tian shui

then u can hear me sing songs and acting mushy on stage lol.
ive always wanted to sing to a crowd, and my dream came true!!!! (i mean, if you dont count choir)
sososo do support me alright (: tics not available yet though haha.

and its time, to do things i like to do, follow my heart and make my dreams come true (:

2008-03-14T22:49:00.000+08:00

haha, been thinking alot, like what i used to do.
sorry to make everyone confused with me, or emo with me, or worried.

URGH. i think im really bad. haha.
sorry louis (:
i mean sorry louis1!
dont come and find me again!

today i cried and cried on the mrt, kfc, stairs.
cus everyone's telling me to let go
this time i will go against my heart,
listen to everyone...

and start on a new beginning (:
ill be strong,
ill still wish for miracles
but ill be practical (:

ok ill dedicate a song to all my readers

In the years to come
Will you think about these moments that we shared

In the years to come
Are you gonna think it over
And how we lived each day with no regrets

Nothing lasts forever though we want it to
The road ahead holds different dreams for me and you

Sometimes goodbye, though it hurts in your heart,
is the only way for destiny
Sometimes goodbye, though it hurts,
is the only way now for you and me
Though it's the hardest thing to say
I'll miss your love in every way
So say goodbye
But don't you cry
'Cause true love never dies

In a year from now
Maybe there'll be things
we'll wish we'd never said

In a year from now
Maybe we'll see each other
Standing on the same street corner, no regrets

Each and every end is always written in the stars
If only I could stop the world
I'd make this last

Sometimes goodbye, so it hurts in your heart,
is the only way for destiny
Sometimes goodbye, so it hurts,
is the only way now for you and me
Though it's the hardest thing to say
I'll miss your love in every way
So say goodbye (so say goodbye)
But don't you cry
'Cause true love never dies

And when you need my arms to run into
I'll comfort you
Nothing will ever change the way I feel

Sometimes goodbye, though it hurts in your heart,
is the only way for destiny
Sometimes goodbye, though it hurts,
is the only way now for you and me
Though it's the hardest thing to say
I'll miss your love in every day
So say goodbye
But don't you cry
`Cause a true love never dies

i still believe in true love

2008-03-13T22:52:00.000+08:00

i wonder.. when couples intro themselves to other ppl, do they say: thats me and her, or do they say: thats us?

2008-03-12T22:56:00.000+08:00

sorry to all those who cared for me..
ill stay strong, ill depend on myself..
cus i know its a bad thing to make people whom i care and who care for me worried. esp when ive been hurt so badly, i dont want to see people hurt cus of me

after all these, i felt that im forced to stand up myself, forced to leave the shelter i thought will always be there. i feel like im forced to grow up.. and face this cruel world, even though i rather be a small girl anyway.

a small girl that will be happy easily
a small girl thats naive
a small girl that gets over her sadness when something simple like a sweet will cheer her day up

say goodbye to that small girl inside my heart.
shes dead

2008-03-11T08:26:00.000+08:00

u made the promise of forever
u were the one who brought me out of darkness and said: ill never break your heart like what they've done.
u said our love would be unbreakable
u said i am the most important person in your life
u said breakup is a word we shouldnt mention anymore
u said u'll only fall deeper into love with me.
u said we will grow old and die together
u said u will never make me cry ever again.

and now u just said u want a break up just like that, so suddenly. u gave up our love so that u can search for a better girl. so u just cast me away, like im a toy. were u toying with my feelings all along? u didnt even care about my feelings, u heartlessly said you dont love me anymore. u're too cruel to me.

haven't i give you everything?
u didnt cherish me
u didnt

do you think a sorry helps to make me feel better?
do you think a sorry can help to solve all problems?
u ended our relationship just with a word sorry??

how can u do this to someone that truly loves you?
just ignore her feelings and move on?
how could you

2008-03-07T23:09:00.002+08:00

pictures grabbed from class blog! (:
www.08s6a.blogspot.com

pictures grabbed from class blog! (: www.08s6a.blogspot.com <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_ZfOC8uVjSE0/R9Fa3zII5QI/AAAAAAAAAH8/Kp_bRiRmxjg/s1600-h/meilingandxinyi.jpg"></a> xinyi, me! we love shopping (: <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_ZfOC8uVjSE0/R9FbSzII5RI/AAAAAAAAAIE/_6uM-hKDPac/s1600-h/me+and+shuang2.jpg"></a> me and <span style="font-size:130%;">爽</span>^2!! <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_ZfOC8uVjSE0/R9Fb2TII5SI/AAAAAAAAAIM/aNcvZSKNZTk/s1600-h/me%21.jpg"></a> me and me only! (: <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_ZfOC8uVjSE0/R9FcUzII5TI/AAAAAAAAAIU/KkiHSKL1_2Y/s1600-h/meandpinyan.jpg"></a> me and pin yan(clement) acting as ms ong and mr pang. LOL. retarded imposters :P <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_ZfOC8uVjSE0/R9FdUDII5UI/AAAAAAAAAIc/jpJ352JVeII/s1600-h/msongandmrpang.jpg"></a> the real people (: grabbed from kenghwee's friendster: <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_ZfOC8uVjSE0/R9FdyTII5VI/AAAAAAAAAIk/QrRqg_raF2Q/s1600-h/meandkenghwee.jpg"></a> long ago pic i think. just found it and posted it up! why do i have so many retarded photos? lol. although HC is fun, i miss CSS! miss the times i can easily find gan jiejie and gossip, and talk about the bad stuff of our bfs. haha or just emo together. anyway im in taekwondo and ge fang! (: im taking PCME! im in 08s6a! there's a louis in my class! im in hwa chong! okay i think thats just a very brief summary. will blog when i have the mood to do so! (:

xinyi, me! we love shopping (:

me and 爽^2!!

me and me only! (:

me and pin yan(clement) acting as ms ong and mr pang. LOL. retarded imposters :P

the real people (:

grabbed from kenghwee's friendster:

long ago pic i think. just found it and posted it up!

why do i have so many retarded photos? lol.
although HC is fun, i miss CSS!
miss the times i can easily find gan jiejie and gossip, and talk about the bad stuff of our bfs. haha or just emo together.

anyway im in taekwondo and ge fang! (:
im taking PCME!
im in 08s6a!
there's a louis in my class!
im in hwa chong!
okay i think thats just a very brief summary. will blog when i have the mood to do so! (:

2008-03-02T11:33:00.000+08:00

SUNDAY! and im having monday blues already.
there's also tues, wed, thurs, friday blues. sigh*

if only everyday can be saturday.

the performance by yeow kheng and friends at NYJC ytd was abit too abstract for me to understand. haha, but i know that from now on, i will be reminded of ytd whenever i see a butterfly.

i miss everyone!
everyone is telling me that they miss me too.
:/
why cant we be in the same school from nursery to university?

2008-02-28T20:25:00.000+08:00

hai, didnt get to see the choir performance. kinda sad ):

i duno why but alot of bad things happened today, and im in a bad mood.

2008-02-22T23:16:00.000+08:00

:/ i just realised, i might have offended people without knowing it.

im sorry to all those that was once pissed off, or sad or angry cus of my actions, cus i really dont mean to hurt anyone!

yea.. i realised that its very easy to make a person dislike you w/o you knowing it and its quite scary sometimes cus u dont know what happened.

_____________

yea, life is getting more and more stressed up and i cant bear to think that two more years is A levels! just after we conquered O lvls there's another thing to worry about. lol.

hwa chong is still okay, trying to mix around but feel lost sometimes. but its okay, for now everyone seems friendly to me xD

aye, good luck for two years ahead!

2008-02-21T22:03:00.000+08:00

HEY! haha, was stealing pictures from kenghwee's blog!
our jiao zi session was kind of successful! at least its super edible! xD

lol, anyway!

life in hwa chong was okay, didnt really take much time to adapt, cus its so chinese there! i kind of like it. but still, missing everyone! :/

pictures!

hows my photography skills? =x

oh yea and from here can see nj! makes me think of ngee kiang and xiao ye!!!!

missed yuling, qilings, and everyone in 4/1!
and of course all the people i know in css.

ok no emoing!

oh and of course, this is me! (:

yes, and my hair is messy as usual!

is everyone happy in their new school? i do hope so..

wishing for a gathering soon,
but meanwhile, happy mugging! lol!

2008-02-15T23:00:00.000+08:00

LOUIS MY LOVE<3

i like the retarded times we always shared!(:

thanks for yesterday, yesterday yesterday, yesterday yesterday and all the way from 14/10/06 till now! :D

although we quarrelled real badly, we're childish and we always make ourselves angry, jealous and everything, everyday is still valentines! :D:D

yea and thanks for the people who gave me gifts! friends really do make me feel loved too! *smiles*

anyway today is photo taking day! full strength of 08S14, last few days of us together.
sigh, life is full of people coming into our lives and leaving sooner or later. but its a fact that we have to get used to it, although it takes us some time to accept this.

argh, must be emo-ing lol. i still remembered the time we cried real badly when ms kirk and ms tan is leaving. or should say, we cried like mad. maybe that time we were still young and haven't experienced this word called

离

yea lor! so now like want cry but cannot cry out already. and watch too much sad movies until see something sad also cannot cry. lol.

AHH. k stop emo-ing le. louis's finally off work yay!

2008-02-11T11:55:00.000+08:00

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR (:

today is monday and i missed school! eh no, i dont miss school but i bet school missed me! BUT ANYWAY, im rotting at home with a blocked nose and buckets of phlegm in my throat.

and a huge pimple on my nose.
lol, makes me look like a clown.

ang pow money till now is.. 240 + 101+ 120 = 461! not bad right! and i actually used a calculator to help me do this addition. :X lol, hopefully maths cells will come back to me soon, my mental calculation is getting from bad to worse.

but anyway, yesterday i went to sentosa, indiah lookout to see the flowers! BIG DISAPPOINTMENT actually :S i think botanic garden is better. lol. not as much flowers as i have expected.

pictures

sigh. im doing chem while rotting away..

2008-01-30T22:35:00.000+08:00

HELLO (:

beloved readers, i think not much left lol :D
but anyway! life in jj is pretty okay for now. finding more and more friends that i can chat with, and although lectures are still as boring as usual, im happy here!

nop, not a brainwashing/brainwashed post, just to say i like the people here and the people here like me! (bu yao lian lol =x)

my class is 08S14 and there's two christopher's in my class haha. largely dominated by nanhua people, but there's still a mix of schools here. everyone's fun-loving and lecture-hating. hmm nice new word. lol

crashed into NJ someday ago, and its like chim-ness @.@
only attended the physics lecture, so its still ok i guess!

and the acjc guard dont let me and nk into the school! bad guard ):

its okay though! lets see, a cheer by jj

do you really think i care? dont care dont care
do you really think i care? i dont give a damn~ i dont give a damn~ i dont give a damn

do you really think i care?

I DONT GIVE A DAMN!

hahaha, do ask me to sing it for you next time you see me!

love, meiling

2007-12-26T12:01:00.000+08:00

haha prom night and xmas all over already. did everyone had fun?

well i think some of us sure did!
yuling jx and louis came over to my hse for sleepover cum countdown!! and of couse we had activitise like erm lucky draw and gift exchange. ALSO, steamboat! muahaha.

yea and so we had steamboat + christmas songs in the background. the next day de steamboat never on music so everyone like eat in silence lidat 0.o

lol, and we had frog leg bee hoon for breakfast! :D

oh ya and thanks for the gifts! i received an eeyore and vouchers from louis, book and bear from yuling, piglet from jx, and a pair of silver coated earrings from sis! thankssssssss! :D:D

haha, santa claus didnt visit our house, cus we didnt go and sleep till abt 3, we're bad children =x

alright pictures!!!!

us + xmas deco!

me and sis!

the first to get drunk

all of us doing facial!

haha alright thats all :D

2007-11-29T10:27:00.000+08:00

hey! went shopping ytd at robinsons! (:
mum helped me buy a prom dress which is black and white, $59
actually is cus she want me to wear it during some relative's wedding. haha. if not i have to wear the dress i bought earlier on le.
new shoes $39,
bag $12.90 (bought at john little)
wallet( really cute ok!! got two small dogs!) $14.90

bought some xmas presents for louis and his mum too. haha.
but anyway, please remember to floss ur teeth mr louis. D:

andand i got a new handphone some time back. its silverrr but abit bulky la. got some nice things like the camera and the music player. also weird things like adobe reader inside the phone -.-" if only we can bring handphones into the exam hall, haha.
ok after beating around the bush, my phone is n73.

ok now for the business that kept me busy for quite a few weeks... rushing here and there getting materials T-T

pictures!

hmm the two penguins are alr booked by yuling, but srysry! when baking them the girl fell down and now it cant stand le.. now doing a new girl =x

hmmm anyone wants to buy anything? i can remake the penguins.. they are abt 3cm tall anyway, cute and small!

and do check out the website for our products which will open in early december, just in time for xmas! (: http://www.xanga.com/myriadlovers

handphone straps, necklace, bracelet etc can be done using the pieces above!
and they are handmade! (by me!)

new designs are out sooooon once i get some fresh ideas haha.
do tag and comment (hopefully no negative ones ): )
alright cya!

2007-11-18T08:28:00.000+08:00

hello! :D been busy the past few days esp yesterday! zhang lao shi so pretty! :D:D lol and its the first time i see yuling wearing a dress. hm... if only she take out her jeans haha (: and three couples went dinner together... in kopitiam lol. not much interaction though.

its already sunday! and looks like its a peaceful and quiet day for me after some days of walking around, shopping etc.

heng i get to rest at home.. if not my pinkies will become purplelies. er... they are not redies already since i poked them haha :D
*pinkies refers to my last toe on both feet T-T cus both of them developed a huge blister(and no, blisters cant be eaten)*

sigh. i had a weird dream yesterday. i dreamt about buying vacuum cleaners 0.o haha so weird.

okay, i updated! :D

2007-11-02T18:55:00.000+08:00

*clears the dust and cobwebs*

yay my blog is revived! hurrayyyyy.

haha. o lvls are so.... so.....
soooooooooooooo ):

nvm its going to be over! yay

2007-10-08T22:49:00.000+08:00

YAY! phy and geog jump two grades! L1R5 14 now!
minus 4 is 10!!

thankew mdm quek!!

2007-09-25T22:59:00.000+08:00

yay. update! :D

awww. my l1r5 dropped from 14 in mid year to 18 in prelims. :S
english from b3 to c6,
phy from b3 to b4,
CH from B to D7
a math from b3 to c6
geog from b4 to b3
e math stays a1, but lower now
chem improved to b4(woah.. thanks to daryl)
bio stays as b3
hcl improves from c5 to b3 (unexpected jump 0.o)

soso, conclusion is my results dropped.
all teachers think its dengue. :S
but anyway since its a drop, i can only blame it on myself :D
but lets be positive, seniors all had a very big jump from prelims to O levels.. some even 18 points? *gasp*

so i can make it! gogogo :D

today did RV prelim chem paper2007.. i actually got a2 for the paper 2's section A
suddenly discovered my chem talent? what a joke =x
im trying to like chem! and i owe daryl a lunch cus i passed my chem like finally. hahahaha. :P *sigh* i wish i can get like a1 for O lvls. i think its possible.. :D

and we only have one prelims this year. ):
some schools are getting like 2-3 prelims.
is it unfair? i think so. :S
we are drowned with so much homework we dont even get time to study anyway *sulk* so even if there's 1000 prelims it wont help too.

but i guess 2-3 prelims will average out the bad grades or give u a chance to push up lower ones. *sulk* nevermind! after o lvls hopefully everything will change. and my god. our english grades were like O.O. haha.. msg of 5+?

lets not blame the paper but blame ourselves for not being so smart instead :D
alright. nights!

2007-09-17T22:10:00.000+08:00

for the sake of updating. hee.
bye!

2007-09-05T11:29:00.000+08:00

yay XD
okay im slow but its a post about the stupid dengue thingy.

-.-" im superly superly bored locked up at my house. thank goodness tmr's a thursday. which means my last blood test will be out and i will probably be free to roam the worldddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd. woots. xD

haha. anyway thanks for all the people who visited me! i feel bad about ms teo's visit cus i was sleeping then. =x and jolynn and perry also.. sorry sorry! haha.. i think i broke my record by sleeping like.. 12 hours a day or more?! =x

zzzzzzz

anyway, thanks for people who sms-ed me too! ((:
yes i will get well soonnnnnnnnnnnnnn.
actually im already well alr.

staying at home is tough. but i did fun things like.. watch tv whole day. andddddddddddd bake cupcakes! omg. its like the nicest thing you can find in my house and is edible right now -.-"

anyway, i think we really have to cherish our lives. who knows when another stupid mosquito will bite and end our life just like that! :/
well.. do buy lots of insurance and anti-mosquito patches that you can stick on yourself to prevent them from biting you xP

haha.. alright. cya!

2007-08-26T13:49:00.000+08:00

haha thanks daryl for your three super huge lollipops, one cookie stick and your strawberries!! xD omg so you are actually sensible enough not to buy pads for people's birthday XP.. thanks big bro!

2007-08-26T13:31:00.000+08:00

thanks louis yuling and jx for visiting me for two days! (:
finally after two days of fever, im okayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
oh yeah thanks for the cake too! xD haha.. i wished there was a bbq though =x
oh and thanks for my birthday present mr pork heh heh :P

my body is itching!! :S what did i get la.. dengue? hand foot and mouth disease? errrr... ): even my fingers are swollen. my face some parts also. i think i look hideous T-T i think they look worse than pimples URGH.

ayeaye. my throat is still hurting. :S
oh well go study! first day mugging for prelims after two days of slacking and sleep ): i think ill flunk CH or geog.. a math confirm flunk....... *sigh*

2007-08-23T20:59:00.000+08:00

lets work hard to get As for prelims and eventually O lvls! (:
prove to teachers that our batch is not as bad as they think!
yay! gambatte!

2007-08-19T11:00:00.000+08:00

seems to me that christians are not that bad afterall.. haha just managed to change my views about christians after the mount loa incident. well i guess some christians are really nice in sharing their views about the world.. like how not to have sufferings etcetc.. and having a peaceful life or sth. i just got a booklet but i guess i'll probably pass it to daryl ltr on. haha. i used to just dump them away =x

well well. is there an afterlife actually? hmmm.. so which version is true? is there really a heaven or hell? well.. the answer will only be revealed after our own death (:

alright have to do bio if not no time for homework ltr since going off for tuition *crys* haha alright. homework time!!

2007-08-15T21:43:00.000+08:00

List out your top 5 birthday presents that you wish for:
ONE- lollypops!
TWO- more lollypops!
THREE- i want to redo my oral T-T
FOUR- i want everyone to be happy!
FIVE- i want everyone to like me!

1.the last person who tagged you is
yuling!

2.your relationship with him/her
she's my dar according to her. haha :D

3.your 5 impressions of him/her
shes growing taller*screams and wails.. nonono.. im taller*
shes pretty!
BUT shes taken! (awww)
we have alot of common factors.
her handwriting is small

4.the most memorable thing he/she had done for you
she whacked me T-T

5.the most memorable words he/she had said to you
LOL! the sms that was meant for another person and she sent it to me. but its okay honey, i'll be ur hubby if you want me to xPP

6.if he/she becomes your lover, you will..
muahaha.. how many chewren you want? mmm..12? =x

7.if he/she becomes your lover, things he/she has to improve on will be
dont abuse me!!!

8.if he/she becomes your enemy, you will...
0.o try know her better so that i can win the battle (woo it rhymes) haha just kidding.. most probably we will be killing ourselves

9. if he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be ...
we realise that our great great great grandfathers are enemies? 0.o

10.the most desire thing you want to do for him/her now is ...
i haven give her those gummy bears i just remembered

11.your overall impression of him/her
mmmm.. a very nice friend! (and lover!)

12.how you think people around you will feel about you?
immatured?

13.the character you love of yourself
being IMMATURED! LALALA~~

14.on the contrary, the characters you hate of yourself
er.. my childishness. 0.o immaturity

15.the most ideal person you want to be
like a kid with no worries and eats lollypops every meal

16.for people that care and like you, say something to them ...
(: thanks.. and sorry for being so bad at times

17.pass this quiz to 10 persons that you wish to know how they feel about you

1) louis
2) xiao ye
3) ngee kiang
4) jolynn
5) wendy
6) li ping
7) keng hwee
8) kaiteng
9) daryl
10) kelvin
[note.these 10 ppl includes those who have to do survey.and those named for below survey]

11.who is no.6 having relationship with?
hmm not sure leh.. i dont think so?

12.Is no.9 a male or female?
good question! i dont know. =x

13.If no.7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing?
heh heh heh.. i cant imagine that happening

14.How about no.8 and 5?
noooooo.. no lesbians! anyway they are both nice people :D

15.What is no.2 studying about?
for today i think it will be a math

16.When was the last time you had a chat with no.3?
hmmm sms considered? haha a few hours ago?

17.What kind of music band does no.8 like?
band? not sure.. but for music.. she doesnt really like hokkien songs... i think she likes jay chou. haha

18.Does no.1 has any siblings?
elder sis? mm and some other "sisters" or "BRUDDERS"

19.Will you woo no.3?
hehe why not? she's so nice. nono.. not lesbians, woo her out for a movie or something?

20.How about no.7?
sureeeeeeee. awww this reminds me of the last vivo outing :D

21.Is no.4 single?
yea i think so.. xD she's got high expectations, so not just any guy will fit the bill alright!

22.What's the surname of no.5?
ONG!

23.What's the hobby of no.4?
mmm... watching movies like the simpsons and POC? haha.. i think she watched those movies multiple times already..

24.Do no.5 and 9 get along well?
hmmm they dont know each other. but i think they should get along pretty well?

25.Where is no.2 studying at?
my school! (:

26.Talk something casually about no.1
haha. he is very _______ and he is ______ . also, he _______ and likes to _____.
fill in the blanks urself! ai yah actually he's lame =x

27.Have you try developing feelings for no.8?
yeps! shes my very good friend!

28.Where does no.9 live at?
a few blocks away from me.. yes do go and disturb him XD

29.What color does no.4 like?
purple and blue? i think so..

30.Are no.5 and 1 best friends?
not best friends but friends i think :D

31.Does no.7 likes no.2?
YEAPS! we are from the qilinggongzhus okay!

32.How do you get to know no.2?
the first time was sec one camp i think.. i kinda shielded her from the water bombs lol

33.Does no.1 have any pets?
yes. one kitty that gives a high pitched meow. and scratches and BITES people.

34.Is no.7 the sexiest person in the world?
yesyesyes! sexyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy hot babe!!!!!! haha ((:

2007-08-15T18:13:00.000+08:00

IT is

as much as what monsters eat,
as deep as the deepest hole,
as high as the last fragment of sky,
as wide as 360 degrees,
as powerful as an atomic bomb,
as strong as the faith in us,
as profound as it is.

mmm yes. that will be the quantity of 1/10000000000000000000000000000000 of my love for you if you want it in other terms XD haha. see my post is always more logical and nicer to read xP

2007-08-14T22:16:00.000+08:00

ORAL IS FINALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLY over.
(: lol.. i still think my ulcer sucks.

its so paiseh lah.. i took like 4 attempts to open the exit door..
at first i tried to open but cannot.. then i realise maybe door lock then i go turn the lock.. then the examiners said: "hey girl you need to press the white button.." then i turned around and thanked them.. then i press the white button and realise it didnt open still.. and they told me earlier on i have locked the door...

-.- and finally i turned it to unlock, pressed the white button and went out

lol.. so isnt my oral pretty screwed?
nevermind, that stupid ulcer on my tongue shall be the excuse for not doing well (just kidding) im worried though. they only ask me like.. 4-5 qns. 0.o people got like 6-7?
*shrugs*

well anyway im feeling very hot now. literally.
and its been like since primary sch since i coughed and have flu at the same time. lol.. must be the long john silvers xP
i think im going off to sleep soon..
since my mum says i should have a day off too

didnt mean to pon sch sry =x

2007-08-09T11:02:00.000+08:00

went vivo ytd, had lunch at kopitiam
then went movie: the simpsons!

:D:D its a nice movie.

then went play with water on rooftop. everyone got wet, like totally. haha.. i guess we had a great time splashing water at each other

then after that went steamboat with louis. we had to walk there like in 30 mins 0.o so farrrrrrrrrrrrr. then after that started eating lor.. quite nice.. got crab, prawn..etcetc..

:/ i nida mug already..

2007-08-02T20:44:00.000+08:00

lets see.. about this sexist topic discussed in louis's blog, gee i personally think girls should be more sensitive towards stuff and get hurt more easily. and i think thats why they need more care and understanding! :D thats what a boyfriend is for.. right O__o

guys should have a bigger heart and accept this. XD this isnt sexist lah.. well guys are mostly sexists anyway. if not why are they mostly straight and cant they be gays? cus in the first place there's a difference betw boys and girls anyway. a fine clear line. while i do not deny that its not good to be sexist, cus its discrimination of some sort, well i think there's still some difference that we need to adapt to so as to suit and "please" the other gender. HEHE.

well anyway in schools when guys do pushups as punishment we most likely get squats. sexism?

nops, just adapting to people's characteristics, i feel. anyway girls get PMS about 3/4 of their time.. like pre menstrual syndrome, post menstrual syndrome. and whats 1/4 of the time left? well, DMS! during menstrual syndrome...

-.- you think we like it being emo all the time and getting HUGE moodswings meh. lols..

okay, even guys are sexists. when u drive on the road, you see a car slowly moving, or have problems parking or just anything to do with driving. first thought: must be a female driver. lol...

well even if you say girls are sexists in the case you stated, then i'll enjoy being a sexist! ^^

lol.. alright just a friendly thought to louis's post :D
___________________________________________________

woosh. i just slept like 3+ hours and i think i feel energetic! but somehow i just dont feel like doing homework. mmm thats why im spending time here blogging!

so there's bio to do, math, chem, CH!! (bytmr), geog two weeks ltr, and physics quizzesssssss and remedial worksheets.

homework spammers -.-

anyway, i better be off! :D